runaway balls

Yesterday was a particularly hot day. After having a long serving of cold tea, I got on the subway to come back home. The ride took much longer than expected, since the train stopped for almost 20 minutes in the middle of the dark, humid tunnel. In that period of time, the cold tea made his way through my digestive system and was ready to be discarded. The minutes went by very, very slowly. I could feel each one of the 60 seconds of every minute in my urethra. When we finally got to my stop, I raced home and once there, towards the bathroom, to relieve myself.
This is when something very strange happened. The liquid came from me with such a power that my penis and scrotum were pushed away from my body, right onto the floor. I was paralyzed there, just looking down at them, when they suddenly began to move: the penis got up from the floor and using the scrotum like little legs, they began to give baby steps. It took me a while to react to what was happening. i looked down and my body was totally smooth where my penis once stood. Meanwhile, it had began running around trying to escape from me, the scrotum moving faster and faster, like 2 tiny baby feet. I followed them all over the apartment, but they were fast. I always though my penis was sneaky and had a mind of its own, but never like this: it jumped up on the kitchen cabinet and looked down at me, showing me those tiny lips that now seemed to be smiling at me, mocking me. When I tried to jump up and catch them, they jumped on top of my head, bouncing down to the floor. I ran after them, trying to cut them off in this frantic race. At one point, they even began spouting some slime which made the chase very slippery, making me slide and fall a couple of times. I finally cornered them in the bedroom. The 2 little sacks were moving one way and the other but they were trapped. I finally had them! I jumped on top of them with all my body weight. It was then when I felt the incredible pain. So painful, that I passed out.
When I opened my eyes, about 20 minutes later, we were back to normal. All together, all attached.
That's why I don't drink ice cold tea anymore.